Monthly Archive:: April 2014

We are all a little Norma Jean

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I’ve always kind of liked Marilyn Monroe. My grandmother and sister in law were always big fans of hers. I am more of an Elizabeth Taylor fan but upon meeting my friend Lindsay (who is a die hard MM fan) I decided to borrow an audio book from my local library called ‘The secret life of Marilyn Monroe’ to find out exactly what Marilyn’s story was.

I was thunderstruck at what I heard. From the moment Norma Jean Mortensen was born till the day Marilyn Monroe died, no life could have been harder. She came from extremely humble beginnings to become the most famous (and infamous) woman in the world. Marilyn Monroe is always associated with beauty and glamour. In her 36 years on this earth she has inspired many a career (I’m looking at you Madonna) and emblazoned our minds with an achievable sense of beauty.

Yet I’m always shocked when someone calls her a whore.

Marilyn operated at a different level then most of us. She came of age in a time when women were expected to get married, have kids and keep the house. Marilyn didn’t exactly fit into this stereotype. But she tried. And I’m guess because she failed she was labeled a whore. She made bad decisions, dated the wrong men, drank a little too much and popped too many pills. Oh, and she had sex with more then one man in her lifetime.

I noticed that people who don’t like Marilyn immediately label her as a pill popping drug addict. Now that I’ve heard more of her story, I’m inclined to think those people, who are always screaming that Marilyn didn’t actually say all those things the memes say she did, see a little of themselves in flawed people. Anything that doesn’t capture our interest, or annoys us, we look for a flaw and exploit it. These people think that telling young women not to make Marilyn Monroe their role model are a little misguided. Marilyn is a role model and a dire warning. She created a sense of romantic sexuality without being obscene. She proved you could be sexy, beautiful and flawed but still be loved. Her weakness is what drew people to her. Her mistakes reflect back to us how flawed we all are, and remind us that even the best of us have made awful mistakes. I’m sure if our lives were played out on a public stage, like Marilyn’s were, we would be so quick to judge others. Marilyn paid the ultimate price for the life she chose to live. But I don’t think we can condemn her, without learning from her.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, Marilyn’s story struck a chord in me. Reminded me of all those flawed people I love and continue to love despite their mistakes. Just the way my friends and family continue to love me, despite my shortcomings.

I fell in love with Marilyn today, but only because I see Norma Jean in me.

The angst of a peacemaker

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I am the first born of my parents. I was the first grandchild and first great grandchild on both sides. I came into the world to quite a fanfare.
I was the darling of my grandfathers and the sweetheart of my grandmothers. I lived for their praise and laughter. I was a pleaser. I wanted things to be wonderful. When my parents got upset with me, my first instinct was to please, to make peace. My mom used to say that when she confronted me with a question that called into question my behavior, I would immediately reply ‘Boy you look pretty today mommy’

Make peace, make everything and everyone happy. Be a peacemaker. Yeah ok…

It has carried over into my adult life with some pros and some cons. I find myself being not only a peacemaker but an on-call problem solver. I have a hard time not taking on people’s problems as my own; giving myself anxiety trying to think of solutions to problems that most of the time have nothing directly to do with me. Most of the time, I end up feeling overwhelmed. I want to fix things for people I love and it’s not always within my power to do it. Sometimes I end up feeling resentful because people don’t go ‘out of their way’ to please me in ways I would try for them.
My husband says that one of my best qualities is being able to anticipate exactly what would make someone happy, the right phrase to say to make someone feel good, or making someone who is feeling down laugh. I’ve always felt pride in having this trait. Other times, I’m wracked with guilt when my efforts fail.

Now I see my daughter performing the same way. When I scold her, she immediately tells me how beautiful I am. She tries to temper my anger with pretty compliments and to avoid her wrongdoing.

Somehow, I feel like I’m failing to teach her to make herself a priority and not bury her head in the sand when it comes to unpleasantness. I come from a family of ‘head buriers’ My father was famous for his ‘don’t worry about it’ attitude. Smooth things over.

I don’t want my daughter to feel like her problems can be glossed over or left on the back burner (which I tend to do while I’m busy worrying about everyone else) I have a very hard time taking criticism because I immediate think “Why are they picking on me? What about all the nice things I do for everyone? YOU’RE PRETTY!!!” etc etc etc…

Perhaps I should start being my own peacemaker, pleasing myself and letting everyone else solve their own damn problems.

Rant over
Cheers
QE

Scammer hate

I hate deception.
I’m sure everyone does, but it really bothers me how people want to take advantage of others. So I got a message the other day…

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“We have received a legal petition notice against your name concerning a tax fraud, a tax evasion. So before this matter goes to the federal claim court house, or before you get arrested by the county sheriffs, can you call us back on our call back number which is 866-978-8345? I repeat 866-978-8345. Don’t… disregard this message and do return the call. Again, this is Sebastian Dusk from Tax Audit department. To know more about this case, kindly press 1 now. To ignore this message please press 9. You have a blessed day. Good bye.”

Apparently this guy gets around, since April 1st has been calling so much that there is a thread about him on callercenter.com..

UGHHHHHHH….

from 800 notes (the number the guy called me from) Someone posted this about him

from 800 notes (the number the guy called me from) Someone posted this about him

So if anyone has an idea on how to punish this guy let me know. I’m calling the IRS to report him, but thought maybe the OA community could do something….

Opie do you want to call this guy on the radio?

Would be fun…

check this out

I promised my sister in law I would post a link to her blog.
She has 5 awesome kids and a life that can only be described correctly as a circus. In her blog she posts about her children (my beautiful nieces and nephews) and their every day trials and triumphs. Please take a moment to bookmark it and check it out!
much much appreciated

Cheers
~QE

http://fivelittlesmiles.wordpress.com/